Tired but don’t snore? Sleep apnoea in women — signs & next steps.

Always tired, foggy mornings, no booming snore? Here’s a calm, practical plan.

Jump to a section

Start here • Self-check • Red flags • Why this happens • Fixes for today • Cycle tweaks • SHEIQ 2-Minute OSA Screener™ • Scene kits • Decision ladder • Talk to your GP • Downloads • Sources

Start here (3 quick wins)

• Side-sleep tonight. Put a pillow behind your back or hug a cushion so you don’t roll onto your back.
• Do a gentle nose-first bedtime. Quick saline spray, then a quiet wind-down (no screens for the last 30 minutes).
• Run a morning check-in (~60 seconds). Note how refreshed you feel, whether there’s a headache, and any night toilet trips.

You’re not lazy or “just stressed.” Women can have sleep apnoea without loud snoring. This guide is information, not medical advice. Small, steady changes help while you line up proper checks.

Today at a glance (so it feels doable)

• Time today: ~8 minutes total
• You’ll need: 1 extra pillow or cushion • simple saline nasal spray • a notepad/phone note
• Likely wins by Day 7: fewer wake-ups • less dry mouth • clearer mornings

Self-check (2 minutes)

Tick what fits this week:

• Wake unrefreshed most days, even after a full night
• Note morning headaches or sore throat / dry mouth
• Log night toilet trips (once or more)
• Feel daytime fog by mid-morning; fight to focus
• Doze on the sofa or as a passenger
• Hear from a partner about breathing pauses or gaspy breaths (with or without snoring)
• Notice neck/shoulder tightness on waking; jaw clench or teeth grinding

Keep this list for your GP chat.

Red flags (get urgent help / safety note)

• Do not drive if you’re excessively sleepy in the day. Arrange assessment first (see DVLA guidance).
• Inform your manager/Occupational Health if you feel sleepy in safety-critical roles.
• Seek urgent help via NHS 111 or 999 for severe chest pain, sudden breathlessness at rest, fainting, or stroke-like symptoms.

(Most sleep apnoea situations are non-urgent; the safety issue is sleepiness—especially with driving or safety-critical work.)

Why this happens (plain English)

Sleep apnoea is stop–start breathing during sleep. In women it can look quieter—less obvious snoring, more broken sleep, dry mouth, morning headaches, night loo trips, and daytime fog. Hormones, weight around the neck, nasal dryness, and back-sleeping can all make it worse. The good news: you can try simple side-sleep and nose-care tweaks now, then get properly assessed so you’re not dismissed.

This guide supports, not replaces, your clinician’s advice.
A “home sleep test” is a small device you wear overnight at home to measure breathing and oxygen while you sleep.

Fixes for today (you control these)

1) Set up side-sleep (3 minutes)

• Place a firm pillow behind your back or hug a cushion to keep you on your side.
• Try a soft backpack with a spare jumper inside as a gentle “don’t roll” cue if you keep turning.

2) Clear your nose (2 minutes)

• Spray saline in each nostril before bed.
• Air the room; in UK homes (often no AC), avoid hot, stuffy air.

3) Calm the wind-down (3 minutes)

• Cut screens for the last 30 minutes. Dim lights, do a quiet routine (wash, teeth, book).
• Keep water by the bed if your mouth feels dry on waking.

4) Anchor tiny behaviour cues

• Re-settle on your side if you wake in the night.
• Tick a 3-point morning note: refreshed (y/n), headache (y/n), toilet trips (0/1/2+).

Cycle tweaks (the SHEIQ way)

Some women feel more fragmented sleep before a period. Use this as a kind guide:

• Elevate (earlier phase): keep side-sleep + saline; aim for a regular wake time.
• Ignite (busy mid-cycle): protect the 30-min screen-free even on hectic days.
• Radiate (luteal/PMS): go extra gentle—side-sleep, cooler bedding, earlier lights-down; if you wake, re-settle on your side and breathe 4–6 (in 4, out 6) a few times.

SHEIQ 2-Minute OSA Screener™ (plus Spotter List)

SHEIQ tools are co-designed with UK women. Do this tonight + ask a partner (if you have one):

You

• Mark unrefreshed mornings (yes/no)
• Note morning headaches (yes/no)
• Count night toilet trips (0 / 1 / 2+)
• Record daytime dozing on quiet days or as a passenger (yes/no)

Partner/household spotter

• Listen for pauses/gasps (yes/no/unsure)
• Rate snoring (none / light / loud) — it can be light in women

Score it (rule of thumb):

• If you tick 2+ “yes” in your answers or your partner notes pauses/gasping, talk to your GP about sleep apnoea assessment.

What success looks like in 14 nights

• See fewer wake-ups, feel clearer mornings, doze less on the sofa, and hear fewer noisy/gaspy moments from your partner’s notes.

Rule of 2s

• If you’re still shattered after 2 weeks of side-sleep + nose care or you’re sleepy most days >2×/week, book your GP.

Want it saved? Message OSA now to keep this screener in WhatsApp.
Prefer WhatsApp full pack? Message OSA to our SHEIQ number to get the screener, spotter list, and a side-sleep setup card (gentle reminders only if you say yes).

Scene kits (pick what fits your life)

School-run & commute mornings

• Eat a simple breakfast (keep it small if mornings are tight).
• Don’t drive if dozy. Swap lifts, take the train, or delay.

Shift work (nights/earlies)

• Keep side-sleep on off-hours; make the room cool and quiet.
• Run a 3-step wind-down even after nights (wash, saline, low lights).
• Log sleepiness episodes with time/shift—use it in your GP chat.

Snoring-adjacent but “quiet”

• Ask a partner to listen for pauses or snorts even if you don’t snore.
• Use a slim pillow under the neck plus side-sleep to help keep the airway open.

Decision ladder (what to try next)

• Step 1 (14 nights): Side-sleep + saline + 30-min screen-free wind-down + morning note.
• Step 2: Book your GP if still shattered; bring your notes and ask about a home sleep test.
• Step 3: Discuss treatment options if diagnosed (CPAP, mouthpiece, weight-management support, nasal care).
• Step 4: Protect safety: if sleepy when driving or at work, pause those activities and follow GP/DVLA guidance.

Talk to your GP (copy-paste)

“I’m waking unrefreshed with morning headaches and daytime sleepiness. I don’t snore loudly, but my partner has noticed gaspy breaths. I’ve done 14 nights of side-sleeping, saline, and a screen-free wind-down. Could we arrange sleep apnoea assessment (a home sleep test if appropriate) and discuss next steps?”

Bring your self-check, morning notes, and (if possible) your partner’s spotter notes.